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Episode 25: Barb Dallinger

Rachel Kobus  0:10  
Welcome to Redbird Buzz. I'm Rachel Kobus from alumni engagement. Two-time alum Barb Dallinger has made it her career to empower and support students--so much so she dedicated 30 years to Illinois State University starting in the Wonsook Kim College of Fine Arts and ending as an associate director of events and catering in event management, dining and hospitality. In between she held positions in University Housing Services, Campus Dining Services, the Dean of Students Office, the Bone Student Center, and Braden auditorium. And of course, EMDH, she's supervised hundreds of students for the Bone and Braden, and she made sure to focus on always providing a safe, comforting and stable environment while teaching everyone to value their history. In the end, when all is said and done, she hopes her legacy has been one to be remembered as someone who truly cared about students.

So with us today, what's the word Redbird? Tell us a little bit about yourself, Barb.

Barb Dallinger  1:08  
Well, I'm currently retired now, which is crazy to think about. But I'm also still hanging on a little helping out in Student Health Services and a couple of committees and things. So I'm actually on campus, pretty much. Yeah.

You didn't want to leave? Exactly, exactly. They

Exactly, exactly. They drugg me away kicking and screaming Exactly.

Rachel Kobus  1:33  
And 30 years, you've done so much. But like I said, You are a two time alum. And you started out at Illinois State. And part of the reason I wanted to talk to you today was I see this as and I said this to you earlier, I think in an email if this is your life Barb, because you've done so many different things and had to go down to so many different paths and you're willing to share your story with us, especially during this month. So can we start off talking about you as Barb the student. So Barb, the student at Illinois State University, and what that was like,

Barb Dallinger  2:04  
Barb, the student at Illinois State was so different than Barb the employee. I was very shy, very quiet. Still chatty, but you know--I came in as a transfer, I transferred in as a junior, which back then we didn't have a lot of the transfer services that we had, which made it a lot harder to connect. So really, what I was involved in was the Big red Marching Machine. That was my main involvement. And then I was in the College of Fine Arts because I was a piano major. Excuse me, I'm sorry. No, you're fine. Sorry about that. You're fine. I was a piano major. So I spent a lot of time over in the College of Fine Arts area over there. And then in Big Red. So that was really my home. The thing that made my undergraduate different, I guess was, I was in the process of like, I figure out this whole sexual orientation thing. My junior year when I came here, and the College of Fine Arts to me, it was truly a safe place. I knew when I was in the college that no one would hurt me. I knew when I was on that marching field, that Ed Livingston and our drum major Kevin Jensen, would not let anything happen to me. Because in the residence halls, things were happening. But like the girls on the floor, they jumped me, they beat me up, they threw food on me when I was taking a shower. But as a junior, I didn't have Preview. I knew when I moved into Watterson there was there were these names down there at the desk with little initials after him. But I didn't know what that meant. I didn't know what they did and didn't know who they were. I just knew where the mailbox was, and how to find my room. So when all these things happened, I never told anybody, frankly, because I didn't know who to tell. Yeah. And to make things harder. When I arrived, like literally, right away when I arrived, the adviser in the College of Fine Arts was Herb Sanders and he died. That said, Herb Sanders advisor -- that's right when I got here, okay, so the college was quite upset is they would have been, and the people who were like juniors and seniors and sophomores that already had laid their plan out with them, they knew what they were doing. I'm like, I have no idea what I'm doing here. Trying to figure out what classes you were going to take and how you were going to work this. I was very blessed and that I have a cousin I grew up with, he lived across the street from me my whole life. And I basically followed him, you know, that's fine. I was a year behind him. He's six months older, and I followed him to Illinois Central College, and then when I graduated He was already here, I followed him to ICC--or to ISU, he lived one floor above me and Waterson and very much was like, Okay, let's go find your classes, like, okay, and he'd come and get me and go to dinner, you know, make sure I ate and stuff like that. It's nice to have, it really was it was it was great. But it was a very, it was a very different college experience. I think that a lot of the students have especially a lot of the students now--very, very quiet, very closeted, very trying to figure this out.

Rachel Kobus  5:34  
And, and I will get into talking more about how the campus has changed. And you've been a part of that. And I'm going to use this word a lot throughout our talk, because I think it's a good theme. And to relate to you BB is champion. So how did you champion through having to go through this experience at ISU, you graduated, you went on I know, to a different part as a teacher, which we can get into that too. But how did you champion through knowing that I'm gonna have to do a lot of this by myself, because the resources aren't here yet for me, right.

Barb Dallinger  6:02  
Plus, being closeted. I mean, my family had no idea that I was trying to figure this out, I walked on campus, I was engaged to a man, and then all of a sudden life changed, you know, hugely, and it was just a lot through the woman I was dating. You know, she was much more--she was she was one of the well I've known since I was five years old people. And I'm like, No, you didn't? Because that is not possible. But she was a good resource. Yes. You know,

Rachel Kobus  6:38  
it's surrounding yourself with people, I mean, yeah, you trust and fill up making your own safe environment. 

Barb Dallinger  6:43  
Then when I really hung on to the people from my community college, I was still very, very close with the people from my community college. Crazy, crazy story, went home after that first semester. And all of us who'd got like our group, like seven people had gone to ICC together in the College of Fine Arts there. And we met at the Poison Apple, which really dates us. We met at the Poison Apple when everybody was home from break because we'd all gone different places. And that night, every single one of them, except one. told me they were gay. And I'm like, Excuse me. And they were like, well, we just didn't think you could handle it. So we didn't tell you while we were at ICC. And then it dawned on me it's like so what you were doing when I had to be home at 10:30 was you were dropping me off at home and then you guys were going out and having fun with it.

Rachel Kobus  7:36  
Because you didn't want to tell me but I wanted to tell you and I was trying to figure it out 

Barb Dallinger  7:39  
and I'm trying to figure out anyway it was just crazy somehow you automatically yeah gravitate to the you find your people just like what

Rachel Kobus  7:47  
but like you said to at ISU, Big Red March machine College of Fine Arts that became your that was your place? Absolutely. Place. Yes. And that's in I think, as resources grew, obviously I say we'll talk it becomes better but to know that there was a place and it's good to hear that. Hopefully every student finds signs that place Yes. In find someone like a Barb which. So after graduation, you did not start at Illinois State for your 30 career or your 30 years of a career. You went

Barb Dallinger  8:15  
to St. Louis okay. I moved to St. Louis. My girlfriend at the time, was a safety engineer. She graduated in safety. Okay, so I majored in piano, she majored in safety. She was going to be the breadwinner, so I better go where her job is. And we went to St. Louis, and I was there for close to 10 years. Started out as a kindergarten teacher. And till they figured out I was gay. Well, they didn't figure it out. They asked and I said yes, which was, I don't know, probably stupid. I was going for the honesty points. I lost my job, lost my teaching certificate, and then started working at Shriners Hospital for Children in St. Louis. Worked there for several years, and then made the decision to move back. Because to me, this is this is home. I'm from Morton, this is moved to central Illinois back. And one of my friends was an ISU cop. Oh, and I moved back. It's like, I'm just not sure what I'm gonna do. And she's like, why don't why don't you apply to Illinois State? It's a great place to work. I was like, Okay, why don't I look back. And I started out as the proverbial Secretary three, where everybody starts and work my way up to a secretary four and then a five all these little moves helped me move up. And then when I was working in Housing one day they posted the job for the information person at the Bone Student Center and I was like, you know, I'm gonna, I'm gonna try it. And much to my surprise, I got it. And then yes, but when when I came back to school, when I came came back. I was driving through town here in Bloomington and somebody shot my car windows out as I was driving, and they blamed it on the rainbow pride flag on the back of my car. And it's like, something clicked, and it was just okay--You've taken away the one thing that I want you to do. You've taken away my teaching license, I've been shot at, I've been beat up. I've been, you know, tied up and I mean, just crazy stuff. There really isn't anything you can do to me now. There really isn't. And I'm going to make it my mission to make sure that what happened to me here doesn't happen to the students that I have now.

Rachel Kobus  8:39  
And you did that. Thank you for sharing that because you did like you've done that in, in every way possible. And that was

Barb Dallinger  10:48  
Yes. It was like, you know, I don't care. And my big goal, because I didn't think there was anything else open to me. It's like I had been fired. I didn't think there was anything else open to me--was just some kind of, you know, working in an office somewhere. I had no idea what would happen when I tried for the job at the Bone. Yeah.

Rachel Kobus  11:12  
And then you excelled and sell more and you excelled more and Oh, my God, I don't know what I wish you would do without Barb. Honestly, yeah. It's a true thing.

Barb Dallinger  11:20  
The important thing we learned when I worked in housing, was if Barb gets bored, she gets in trouble. I was in trouble a lot. When I worked in housing, I mean, a lot. And we learned this. So I've always told people I've been here 30 years. I've never worked one job more than four. Except this very last one for me. Okay, that's in EMDH. Yes. I switched positions every four years. Not that I applied for some of them. Yeah. But it was like, okay, like when I was when I was the assistant director of special projects in the Bone. I knew the stuff nobody else wants to do. You know, when I was the assistant director of special projects, they came to me and it's like, we want you we really want you to work on commencement. And welcome week. I'm like, okay, so yes, yeah. And it's like, okay, and it's like it just I gradually, every couple years, something changed. And then one day, my boss walked into my office and closed my door. And he said that he had, they had just fired the person who was the Auditorium Manager. And he said, We want you to take it over. And I looked at him like, well, I have, I have no knowledge and no skills or no training. But if you're okay with that, I guess I am. 

Rachel Kobus  12:41  
 Braden, bring it on. Sure.

Barb Dallinger  12:43  
And Judi Khalilallah was my assistant and became my assistant, and she'd been there for years. So she knew what to do, you know, and I would literally just go to her and go, Okay. And now what is this? Okay. I was very, it was it was crazy, because she had started to create a season. And I was looking at the notes, and I called this producer Don Kronberg, who's one of my dearest friends now. He was he's an agent with Nightlight. And I call them like, hey, it looks like we have Willie Nelson booked with you in September, and he said "you thought you did." And he hung up. And I'm like, Well, this is going well. And I spent three weeks having agents hang up on me, really. And I'd call him back. And my job was to rebuild all the bridges that had been torn down. Got it. And I picked up my phone one day and it was Ginger from William Morris. And she caught me she's like, Barbara, this is Ginger from William Morris Nashville. Like, yes. And she's like, we understand. We're out on the road. Is it you're running Braden now? I'm like, Yes, I'm sure gonna give it a shot. Yeah. And just says I have one question for you, and I'm like, Sure, shoot, and she's like, how come no one's heard of you? And I was like, well, because I've never done this before. But I'm gonna do my best. And I kept calling Don back and saying, you know, I understand because some, yeah, he had a show that did not go well. Like I understand what happened. I understand you're angry. But we're gonna--we're starting over here.

Rachel Kobus  14:29  
You got to create a safe space for everybody in Braden again, then basically, you are literally the creator of comforting, stable spaces Barb.

Barb Dallinger  14:37  
And he's gonna tell you what, said, You don't you don't really know what to do. And I'm like, You are absolutely right. I know. I'm doing what Judi tells me to do. And we're learning it as we go. And he spent three days with me and showed me the ropes, which is probably one of the stupidest things an auditorium manager could do, because you're learning from the agents that are trying to you know-- Yeah, but he was amazing. He's been an incredible resource for me. Not all the shows came from him, obviously. But he was he's in Chicago and he was an incredible resource they sent me to Ball State where one of our alums who used to be a student in Braden runs their auditorium. And I went over I spent a week with him. Wow. And just a brain dump. Into this is what we do. Which was so crazy cuz he'd been a student. Yep. Yep. And he's like, You're what? Like, I know, I'm the Campus tour guide, but

Rachel Kobus  15:44  
not anymore. Not anymore. Braden, no more

Barb Dallinger  15:47  
No more perky chirpy tour guide. Yes. But it opened up this incredible experience that I would just literally sit there. It's like, how is this my life?

Rachel Kobus  15:59  
going from where you were where you started? And yeah, having to work. Like you said, though. You you built up that what else can--What else can go wrong? Nothing is going to go wrong. I'm going to make sure that, yes, 

Barb Dallinger  16:10  
I'm just going to do this. And to the point. I always did and announce at the beginning of the show, because I told my boss, I said, it's very important that people realize it's me now. Yes, that chapter is closed. Yes. It's me now. I said, I'm introducing every single show that start Yeah. Excuse me. And I did. And I went out. And one day, President Bowman was in the audience. And I, it had just been an incredible day. And we'd had a wonderful time. And I made the comments, you know, there are days that I just can't believe this is my life. And I swear I would I would do this job for free. And he came up to me afterwards. And he's like, you know, we can we can make that happen. Yeah. Well, let's, let's not

Rachel Kobus  16:59  
I love this job but not for free.

Barb Dallinger  17:03  
I do still need to, you know, eat like I had a you know, it's like, I don't have a husband. If I had a happy husband and State Farm we'd talk, but I don't. Yeah. Oh my gosh, like, oh, that's crazy. But the stuff. I mean, it's just surreal. Yeah. The stories. I'm actually I'm working with a couple people. I'm writing a book.

Rachel Kobus  17:24  
You are? I am. What's it about your time at ISU? Okay, yeah, did not know that. This is brand new information is good for you. Well, I didn't say page 14. Okay, you only have like 100 or maybe 200 304? Yeah, 

Speaker 2  17:40  
it's basically a day in the life of what happens like with all the different artists Oh, okay. No.

Rachel Kobus  17:47  
So can I have like a little inside scoop? Because that was going to be one of my questions now that we're talking a little bit about Braden of what is some of your favorite fondest memories working at Braden,

Speaker 2  18:00  
I think the thing that was the most surprising is that the people, like quote, the famous people, for lack of a better word, are just people who miss their families, and they're on the road. And my goal was always to make sure they had a wonderful day. It's like, I'm greeting them at the door. Welcome to bring Braden Auditorium we are so glad you're here. And I mean, we had breakfast ready for dinner was always on real China with real silverwear instead of a spork. I never gave them ya know, wedding chicken with three tiny potatoes and broccoli. So I tried to make it because that's what they're getting everywhere on the road. What can we do this different? What can we do to make their day--flowers around decorating the you know, the dressing rooms up a little bit. And it really, it really paid off, in a semi selfish way. Because if they're having a good day, they do a good show. And then my people see a good show. And then they want to buy more tickets. And it's just a circle.

Rachel Kobus  19:05  
You're probably the smartest person in this room right now because that is perfect.

Barb Dallinger  19:09  
I mean, it's that was our goal was always just have a wonderful day with them. And my students were just amazing. Sarah Evans was here and she had her kids with her. And two of my two of my student workers took her kids to the Children's Discovery Museum for the day. I'm like little you're just gonna let my kids take your kids. Oh, yeah, it'll be fine. I'm like, okay. Whatever makes you happy. makes you happy. Yeah. We had a group called Leahy and it's these siblings that are in a band. And they traveled together in the bus with their wives and their kids and their family. And we set the greenroom up basically as a nursery. That makes sense. And a couple of -- a couple of my students were basically running a daycare all day playing with the kids, keeping them safe doing whatever and during the show the littlest Tiny, barely toddler barely walk, I was just having a meltdown. And I while her mom was on stage, I stood at the flyrail holding her so she could see her mom dancing along and I can see Mommy's right there. It's okay. And then anytime we tried to go back was like, Okay, we're staying right here.

Rachel Kobus  20:19  
I love it. These are the stories too-- it's about, again, because you're all about it's a wonderful day and making others feel safe and comfortable. And so yeah,

Barb Dallinger  20:27  
it was it was kind of out on the road that we were, We were difficult.

Rachel Kobus  20:32  
You know, so you're trying to rebrand you're trying to get the reputation 

Barb Dallinger  20:35  
and it's amazing how word travels on the road. Yeah. And when we did get Willie Nelson here, I greeted him with the back door and he walked in. And his first one. I'm like, welcome to Braden Auditorium. He says, I hear you got good food here. I'm very excited to hear you got good food. And I'm like, Thank you get that out there on the road for us. Yeah, no kidding. Thank you.

Rachel Kobus  20:56  
And also, I hope it's good food. Yeah. Good food. 

Barb Dallinger  21:00  
He knew that the table had kind of turned a little man. Yeah. And I mean, yeah, there were times it didn't go well, or whatever. I, we had George Jones, he was just such a love. And it was it was his final tour. And he was ageing. And you know, and I'm sitting in my office one day, and my phone rings. And I answer is like, Barbara, this is George Jones. And I'm like, I have people don't you have people? You know, it's like, if I have people you surely have people? Yes. Yeah, exactly. I just wanted to call and tell you that when we come over a couple of weeks from now. I'm like, Yeah, we're excited about your company. Well just so you know, I just want you to know, I'm going to be wearing my blue suit. Because you know, we're going to be on that stage together. And we got to look good. Just so you know, I'm wearing my blue suit. And I'm like, that is good to know. I will plan accordingly. Thank you. And we're chatting, and all of a sudden he goes, Oh, I gotta go. And he hung up. And it was like, were you not allowed to be on the phone? 

Rachel Kobus  22:02  
Oh my gosh, he called you. Make sure you coordinated correctly.

Barb Dallinger  22:06  
Yes. And we did it. We did. It was good to know was a great v

Rachel Kobus  22:11  
I was thinking a memorable moment then. Yeah

Barb Dallinger  22:15  
he was singing a song. And he had a prompter in front of him with like big letters so that he could see. And his band was playing with him. And it switched to another song. And then they did another song. But then George came back to the first song but the band was playing song number four. And I'm off to the side of the stage, screaming "follow George"

Rachel Kobus  22:45  
Did it work? Did it work?

Barb Dallinger  22:47  
They finally--it was like, do what he's doing. I don't care. You've already done the song. Do what he's doing it again. Yeah, exactly. No, it's like he's obviously not reading the prompter

Rachel Kobus  22:58  
Now you're managing bands on top of it, too.

Barb Dallinger  23:00  
Oh, yeah. That's great. Are they like people would come in. One of the guys from REO came up to me and he's like do you have any-- He's like, my back is just killing me. Do you have any Tylenol or something? I'm like, Oh, absolutely. I can get you a massage, I can. You want some ice? It's like, what? What can we do? So he's like I think I need to lay down. I think I'm just gonna lay down and see if I get my back feeling better. It's like, okay, so I got some Tylenol. And he he did great. He made it to the show. It did great. And he was leaving, and I'm hugging him. And I'm like, Well, hope you feel better. You became you know, be careful. Ice is your friend. And he's like, Okay, fine. And they took off. Well, I generally have the artists cell phone so that I can get a hold of them while they're here. And then I dump it. And I called him the next morning. I said I promise I'm not going to be a crazy stalker person. I just wanted to make sure you're okay today. And he's like, I really am. I'm feeling better. Thanks, that little downtime I had helped and I'm like, Okay, I promise you I'm ditching your phone number. Now. I just wanted to check and he's like, Okay, you have a good rest of the day. I promise you. I'm not a crazy stalker. Perfect.

Rachel Kobus  24:11  
No. That's the extra mile. That's what? Yes, yeah. And that's what makes you that like you did you brought the reputation back, you obviously got the word out in the way you wanted it to. And again, it gets about champion through and being the champion for Illinois State and Braden Auditorium. It's what are we going to do? Yep.

Barb Dallinger  24:28  
My marketing intern told me one time during my announce. He'd be like, Okay, you need to talk. He'd be like, Okay, you need to talk about this show coming up and this show coming up. And you need to talk about this. And I'm like, Okay, fine. Excuse me. And occasionally he would have like four or five things. And I'd go out and I'd talk and come back. He's like, you forgot two, like, I know. I can only I can only remember three things. We have to we have to figure out what's important. Three things. That's my max. Yes. That's good. Okay, so he's done. already gearing everything just seems like okay, these are the three things we're talking about. I'm like, Okay, it's like if you can work in, I'm like three, three, it's like, okay.

Rachel Kobus  25:10  
You know. And so speaking to students to you, and I have to mention, you know, the bone and Braden are going to be celebrating their 50th year and you've been there for a majority of it-- 30. Yes. So I know and then working with all these students and being, you know, starting to become a mentor and a role model for many, what does that feel like to know how much of an impact you've made on the students at Illinois State from where you came from as a student, or like, seeing the changes now too?

Barb Dallinger  25:38  
A lot of people have said that you're talking about having such a lousy undergrad experience, but yet you're such a champion for Illinois State, say, but that's based on my time here as an employee, not necessarily my undergrad. Yes. Or they'll be like, Isn't it weird to work where you went to school? And like, No, I was only here two years. I've been here 30 ss an employee, that's totally different. Yeah. But the relationships that I've gotten to build with them are just incredible. And making sure they've had some really good experiences that they can build their life off-- It's crazy, because my, my kind of original student workers are turning 50, which is just not possible. That's crazy. I was really upset about it at home. I'm just like, they're turning 50. That's not possible. That is not possible. It's just not. It's not. There's not, it's fine. And my my girlfriend wishes as well. I'm like, the math doesn't work. And just wanting you do you know, you didn't birth them. She's like, you got them at 18. Oh, that's true. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. You

Rachel Kobus  26:52  
You missed the first 18 years of their lives

Barb Dallinger  26:55  
Yeah, you're right. It does work. Now. I'm like, holy cow.

Rachel Kobus  26:59  
But--like you're probably with them for a long time. Because you weren't you were there to help these, you know, the students at Braden and the Bone

Barb Dallinger  27:05  
so many of them, so many of them are still in contact with me and call me and stuff. One of my, one of my former students called me, he texted me and said, Hey, I just really need to talk something out with you. And I'm like, Yeah, sure. Give me a call tonight. And we were talking, and he made that comment and he's like, Well, now you know, I'm getting ready to turn 45. And I'm like, okay, stop right there. This just now became all about me. Instead of you.  You cannot be 45. He's like, Well, yeah, I graduated like 20 years ago. It's like, Oh, my God. Okay, give me a minute. And then we'll go back. I need to process that you're, you're, you're turning 45 is like, yeah, that's

Rachel Kobus  27:49  
Haha

Barb Dallinger  27:52  
To my problem. Okay, if we have to, oh, my gosh, but yeah, and so many. My very first student worker, Rhonda, my very first student worker came, she showed up at my retirement reception. She walked in the door, and I just lost it. I'm like, What are you doing here? And she's like, Hey, I saw it. I saw it online. There's no way I wouldn't come. I mean, a bunch of my students traveled like hours to get here. I was just blown away by the response that I got from them. They're just incredible. 

Rachel Kobus  28:32  
That's the impact you've left Barb and --I mean, so it's amazing to hear and see that and I have to bring up to you. You've worked with so many Bone and Braden students, but you also were the advisor of PRIDE for eight years to so you also work with our PRIDE students, our LGBTQA, I mean, work and I think like you said campus is different now toO in that aspect that you were like, Oh, these these students are out. So now what is my oh my goodness do so my How have you my first

Barb Dallinger  28:58  
My first year as the pride advisor. We talked a great deal about it being a safe space. And several students would talk with like, Well, I've been walking past the room, because everybody knew room 375 Student Services building on Wednesday night. That's where the gay kids are. And they talk about well, I watched down the sidewalk for like three weeks. And tonight I finally decided I was just coming in. I was like, Okay, fine. Yeah, we're, we're glad you did. That's why we're here. And they were or they walk in there. Like I think that I maybe want to be here and that I maybe should be and I think I might be gay. But to you flash forward to now because I still do stuff with them. you flash forward to now they're like, well, I was the president of the GSA in junior high. And I was the secretary in high school. And you're like, How are you so together? I mean, it's just night and day when I was working in Housing and getting trouble all the time. When I was working in Housing, one young person went to Preview and talked to people at Preview. And whoever she talked to a preview, senator to me over and Housing. And I looked up and there's this little person knocking on my cubicle. And she's like, they said at Preview that you're nice to the gay kids. Like, I am. I am. Come on in. Yeah. Oh, come on in.

Rachel Kobus  30:32  
Well, you've grown is it? Yes.

Barb Dallinger  30:35  
But I mean, I'm still in contact. Yes. You know, many years later with them. Yes. Like, oh my gosh, yeah. I was working. We used to during Welcome Week, we used to staff the res Hall desks and give them their planners and stuff as a passages person for Welcome Week. And I'm like, okay, too much. This one, this one young lady was coming up to check in. And she had rainbows everywhere. I mean, she had jewelry in here. I mean, she was just rainbowed out. And I got her all checked in. And I took her planner, and I opened it up to the first Pride meeting. And I was like, first Pride meeting. And circled it and handed to her. I'm like, I'll see you there. And she was, like, too much. Too much. Was she there? Did she she was like, no, no, it's just she was with her mom. Oh, yeah. Like too much, sorry, sometimes I have to pull it back.

Rachel Kobus  31:29  
But that's how you get people involved, too. So like you said, you've been, you make an impact on students, whether it's you're working with them, you're advising them, you're being just an ally to knock on a cube for and that's what I think keeps our campus and our students growing and changing and learning what's coming too. So again, you're very appreciated for that bar there appreciate for you for, you know, being the ally, being the champion being what I like to call the historian of ISU, like you said, working through a book now, again, I'm very excited to hear that

Barb Dallinger  32:01  
We're trying to figure out it's like, this is it's like, do you combine the pride stuff with the Braden stuff? Or is that too? Or what do you do that we don't really,

Rachel Kobus  32:12  
we don't know the history behind both, too. So that can be hard. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So

Barb Dallinger  32:15  
we're trying to, yes, figure that out. We'll see. Well, in

Rachel Kobus  32:19  
the end, too, I actually I have to mention, part of PRIDE, you know, learning that you are the advisor, then if made far more sense learning as I came in, that you helped found the LGBTQA+ alumni network to you and Dave Bentlin sought as it as a need. So can you talk a little bit for our alums listening, like, Why all of a sudden, I think it was around 2014. As time like, that became the mission

Barb Dallinger  32:44  
It was so selfish. It's like, I want to know where my babies are. It was so selfish, No, but wonderful. Yeah. And the other the other RSOs a lot of them had an alumni group, and they were like, We should do this, because a lot of the alums would come back for the annual PRIDE drag show. And it's like, we need to do something. We need to not just be hugging and screaming in the ballroom. It's like, we need to do something. And that's when we started doing like a pre the pre reception so that the alums could do that. And we tried to turn it into a full weekend one year with like, you know, brunch the next day. The hard part with the PRIDE students is there's there's no Hi, I'm gay box to check. Yes. I mean, I could give them rosters, yes, but you cannot send them anything unless they give you permission. Yes. So at lavender graduation, we have it out now and asking them you know, I know this is the last thing on your mind. But please sign this so we can send you things. And the very first drag show we did I'm literally standing in the ballroom with this stack of paper walking around PRIDE alum, fill this out; PRIDE alum fill this our--grassroots marketing. Fill this out. Yep. And they're like, why don't like just fill it out and give it back to me. And we really built the list by Yes, contacting people, seeing people. And then during COVID Oh my God, it was amazing. During COVID Alumni Engagement contacted me and said we would like to give you a little COVID burst and told me I could pick a year or like a time when I was a PRIDE advisor. And I could invite like 20 odd students to come to a Zoom meeting. So you've got the perfect Yeah, the perfect square of zoom people. And we did that. And it was it was the PRIDE board from the like 98 ish around there. 98, 99 And it was incredible. It was just so incredible. To see all of them and for them to see each other. Yeah, I forget that I see them but they don't see each other that's part of your network to is to. And we had to figure it out because, like, one of them, one of them is in Israel. And a couple other ones were in like Alaska and California. So timing, okay, when is one is everybody awake? Yeah. Maybe late for some but early for another one, you know. And I contacted Talia and she's like, I don't care when it is. She's like, I don't care. She's the one in Israel. So I don't care. She's like, I will get up at two o'clock in the morning. Just don't worry. And those days Oh, okay. And it was incredible. A just watching them reconnecting. It's like, oh my gosh, what are you doing? A couple of them had like, you know, their kids on their lap or the partner that they married in the background and hung out for a little bit. And at one point, I looked at Talia and she was just sitting there. Like with her head on her hand like on the table. And just--I thought she froze. Like Talia, Are you okay? Did you? Are you there to freeze? Cuz I mean, hello, she's coming from Israel. Like, did you freeze? Are you okay? She's like, No, I'm fine. I'm just, I'm just watching everybody. Like, oh, my gosh, was amazing.

Rachel Kobus  33:16  
And that's again, and I'm gonna say this here too, is for anyone listening. We always encourage you know, if you want to be a part of specific networks, especially like that, okay. Especially, you know, the LGBTQA plus, like you said, it's something that we ask our alums to opt into. So always feel free to reach out to someone like Barb to reach out to alumni engagement office, because we do specific events, we have specific programs, we want to connect our Redbirds in the ways they feel comfortable. So we want to make sure the more that tell us the more we can do for our alums, too. So I'm glad you brought that up that it is definitely something we want to learn. If you aren't already opted in to any again network, please just contact and let us know too.

Barb Dallinger  37:02  
And the Big Red Marching Machine, too.

Rachel Kobus  37:05  
anything, Yes. Anything else? So you know, with that BB I have to end on this too is you know, we're talking about 30 years of you being an advisor, as a supervisor, someone that's created a whole reputation for Braden, someone that's given back so much. And now you've left a legacy recently, it was approved that there is going to be a crew room named after you too, in Braden, so leaving that legacy, because you've done a lot on campus, and you've gifted back to campus, you support campus, you support our students, you know, through fiscal and through your, your talent as well. So I have to mention that that I think that's amazing to hear that you have that so that that's amazing.

Barb Dallinger  37:48  
They, we talked about it. And the other option was the greenroom. Which is where like the stars hanging out or whatever. And it's like, you know, I don't, I don't, I don't want it to be the green room. I want it to be where the student workers hang out. It's their room where they you know, they got lockers and they hang their coats but the book bags up and if they're hanging out, that's where they come and where they eat dinner or whatever. So that's that's where that's their space. I want it to be the students space not something else kind of out there crazy. The other part of it was with so many students that have gone on to do incredible things. Like Steve worked, he was a student worker and he wore today we had David Copperfield and David was so impressed with him he gave him his business card and said when you graduate in a couple of months give me a call. Oh wow. And he went he toured with Copperfield for like five years and then left Copperfield he ran the the theater where like the Oscars and Emmys and stuff are-- he ran that out in LA and he moved to Australia and he ran the Sydney Opera House in Australia, he's now started his own company but I mean I want them to realize there's like eight examples of people who have done this I want you to realize if if you like this, this can be your life. One business card away. I understand Yeah, I understand that you came in that you wanted to major in accounting and go you but if you have fallen in love with this, it is a possibility. Yeah, there there are possibilities out there you just need to utilize those resources.

Rachel Kobus  39:28  
And that's perfect to end on to so thank you Barb for being with us today. We appreciate you.

Barb Dallinger  39:32  
thank you for for asking it was fun thank you

Rachel Kobus  39:52  
so that was two time alum, ISU historian ally champion and proud Redbird Barb Dallinger. Tune in next time to Redbird Buzz for more stories from beyond the quad.

Transcribed by https://otter.ai